Inside the boardroom at Ewood Park....

Inside the boardroom at Ewood Park....

Anuradha Desai: Welcome to Ewood Park Ronald. Do you mind if I call you Ronald?
Ronaldinho: (Nods)
AD: Excellent. So we want you to come and join Blackburn Rovers, we're an ambitious group of chicken fa...I mean... owners and we envisage Champions League Football in the next couple of years.
R: Well that sounds promising. Who exactly is the manager?
AD: I think his name is...hang on I'll just check my notes...that's right! His name is Steve Kean and he truly is a World Class operator.
R: I see. Are there any players of note at the club?
AD: Why yes Ronald. We have Chris Samba...oh no wait it says here in my notes that he wants to leave...hmmm oh yes that's right! We've got David Dunn, you must have heard of him?
R: (Sniggers) Do you mean the same David Dunn who is widely known for that piece of trickery in a Birmingham shirt?
AD: David played for Birmingham? Hmm interesting. You'll have to forgive me, my knowledge of Football spans only from the World Cup this summer. Yes I'd assume that very same one.
R: (Raises eyebrows) Wow yes he really is a good player... What sort of area would I be living in?
AD: Ronald! You will love the North West! Blackburn is a beautiful town, it truly is. It used to have cotton mills but they've gone now and it isn't grey at all...honest.
R: Ah yes! The weather - what am i to expect?
AD: Well it's mixed. Since we've been here it's rained but in different quantities and at different times of the day. You never know what you are going to get. Some days it rains in the morning, some days in the afternoon. Sometimes it actually rains all day. Quite a sight I'm sure you'll agree.
R: So you are telling me it just rains here?
AD: Well it has snowed. That's always fun. Colder but more fun. But who needs the Sun?
R: You do realise I'm Brazilian?
AD: (Checks notes). Oh are you? Oh right. Well it is sunny in the Summer I hear.
R: (Leaves to walk out). I'm not sure Blackburn is going to be the place for me.
AD: No wait! Ronald! I haven't even told you about your bonuses for goalscoring and appearances. We were going to give you a chicken for every goal....